The time is 6:45 pm...and I am still waiting...for no special reason. I could have just gone home and actually kept my mouth shut for the next three days...but I know thats too tough for me, coz I cant realy do without...It was 12:15 pm when I said bye, and expected that it would be just a matter of about a couple of hours, but well...guess I was wrong...
There was not a minute when I did not check my watch and the main entrance for the return...not a single thought where I did not try to hear footsteps...not a single blink where my eyes were not at the door...time - 4:15 pm...I was becoming restless...and so, I was composing a short angry email, when I got a call... "hey, I am taking the rest of the day off...so, can you just..." -Bang!! went my phone...
Why? Why am I still waiting? Me? Neah...I'm busy writing a blog...and once I'm done, I'll be gone...(read: I'm waiting...on the pretext of writing a blog...and I will be done only by the time of return...). Two minds eh?? I am right now in a state of ambivalence...and I dont know which one is correct...yes, I'm angry...frustrated...irritated...restless...helpless...coz I just DONT KNOW what to do!!! Is there any reason for me to be angry? No...who the hell am I to be angry...for a reason which is actually silly(or is it?? for me??)...what right do I have on one's life to take decisions?? I cant stop anyone from going anywhere...can I??
But...what if I want to?? What if I want to spend more time together?? What if I dont really have much time?? Any answers?? If yes, then please help me...coz I dont want to be angry...I dont wanna be frustrated just bcoz I couldnt be an important part of somebody's life...I want to learn to accept things....I want to learn to face reality...and live with it...I want to move on...can somebody help me??
Its 7:13 pm...and there is still no sign of return...should I wait?? Should I not??
There was not a minute when I did not check my watch and the main entrance for the return...not a single thought where I did not try to hear footsteps...not a single blink where my eyes were not at the door...time - 4:15 pm...I was becoming restless...and so, I was composing a short angry email, when I got a call... "hey, I am taking the rest of the day off...so, can you just..." -Bang!! went my phone...
Why? Why am I still waiting? Me? Neah...I'm busy writing a blog...and once I'm done, I'll be gone...(read: I'm waiting...on the pretext of writing a blog...and I will be done only by the time of return...). Two minds eh?? I am right now in a state of ambivalence...and I dont know which one is correct...yes, I'm angry...frustrated...irritated...restless...helpless...coz I just DONT KNOW what to do!!! Is there any reason for me to be angry? No...who the hell am I to be angry...for a reason which is actually silly(or is it?? for me??)...what right do I have on one's life to take decisions?? I cant stop anyone from going anywhere...can I??
But...what if I want to?? What if I want to spend more time together?? What if I dont really have much time?? Any answers?? If yes, then please help me...coz I dont want to be angry...I dont wanna be frustrated just bcoz I couldnt be an important part of somebody's life...I want to learn to accept things....I want to learn to face reality...and live with it...I want to move on...can somebody help me??
Its 7:13 pm...and there is still no sign of return...should I wait?? Should I not??
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